Bill Cosby Quotes And Sayings

God Has Not Made Anything That I Know Of That Pays So Much Attention To Who Their Father And Mother Is As Us.

There Should Be More On Television That Uplifts People And Shows Them How To Better Prepare Themselves For Earning A Living.

When I Was A Child, I Was Living In The Housing Projects Of Philadelphia. I Didn't Even Have A Christmas Tree.

When My Son Was Murdered, People Asked Me How I Felt About God And What Had Happened To My Son. I Said, 'No, You Can't Go There. You Have To Understand That There Is A Devil, And He Works 24/7. Whoever Murdered Our Son Was With The Devil.'

Sometimes I Buy My Wife Flowers.

Fatherhood Is Pretending The Present You Love Most Is Soap-on-a-rope.

I Love Cake. I Love Pie. I Love Potato Chips. I Love Salt. I Do Not Want Yogurt, Plain Yogurt. It's Healthy. 'Why Don't You Like It?' Because It Tastes Like Bad Breath.

I Want To Get Violence - I Want Schools To Start From K Through 12 To Just Every Day Have Teachers Understand That They Don't Want To Talk About Anything That Is Violent, And They Want To Explain To The Children How Bad Violence Is And How Behavior - Violent Behavior, Is Something That They Really Should Not Practice And Think About.

Nobody Asked You To Flip Burgers For The Rest Of Your Life.

If You Have One Of The Worst Schools In The City, Then Chances Are The Teachers Are Not Going To Care For You. Chances Are The Parents Don't Feel Seriously About Coming To Meet With Teachers.

I Love Twitter, But Some People Use Profanity So Much That At Some Point It's Like Saying, 'Pass The Salt.'

When I Decided That I Wanted To Go To College, I Wanted To Be A School Teacher For 7th And 8th Grade Boys Because I Felt That Was An Important Time For Them. I Had Gone Astray At That Point In My Life And Really Wanted To Help Keep Them From Making The Same Mistake I Had Made.

I Managed My Life To The Point That At Age 19 I Was Still In High School. I Decided I Was Too Old To Be Walking Down Those Hallways.

When You Don't Understand Something, You Often Laugh.

There Should Be Marches In Every Neighborhood Every Day Telling The People About The Negativity Of Drugs And How The Drugs Help Us To Behave Negatively.

If You Took Your Child To The Dentist And Check For Cavities, The Child Likely Won't Get Them. If You Take Them Just For Emergency, That's All They're Gonna Get.

I'm A Christian. But Muslims Are Misunderstood. Intentionally Misunderstood. We Should All Be More Like Them.

When You Become Senile, You Won't Know It.

When You Become Senile, You Won't Know It.

I'm Not Going Out And Hitting A 95-mph Fastball Where I Can't See The Stitches. I'm Not On A Professional Football Team Looking To Tackle A Fullback Who Is Built Like Solid Wood. I'm A Thinking Person, And I've Been Blessed With The Ability To See Some Things And Talk About Them In A Way That Registers In A Humorous And Funny Way.

The Problems With Kids Having Short Attention Spans Is Driven By Entertainment, Reset Buttons On Games, Games Having To Do With Getting Somewhere And Heads Blowing Up. Everything Is 'Cut To The Chase, Cut To The Chase.'

There Are Times My Stories Become - What I Feel - Not Only Accessible To Hearing Me On Television, But They Make Wonderful Reading.

Tons Of Comedians Have Said, 'I Grew Up Learning From Bill Cosby. He's Great.' But That Respect Doesn't Mean Much To The Young People. They Like Their Ginger Ale With Hot Sauce.

With My Wife Camille's Help, I Took To Social Networking. I'm Working With The Computers.

In September Of 1960, I Was Blessed - And I'm Not Saying Blessed In The Everyday Religious Way - When Temple University Accepted Me After Scoring 500 On The Sat. I Was 23 Years Old, And They Put Me In Remedial. I Was The Happiest Remedial Person On Earth.

We Are All Anxious To Be Accepted. But If You Have A Strong Mother And Father Who Tell You That You Don't Have To Dress A Crazy Way, Or Hang Out With People Who Are Looking For Trouble In Order To Be Loved And Accepted, Then Half The Battle Is Over.

I Never Saw Anything Funny In A Car Commercial - But That's Ok. Whatever They Wanted To Do - It's Their Product And I'm The Spokesperson, And I'm Going To Deliver.

In All Of My Career, The Style Is Still The Same, And That Is Of A Friend, Just Sitting And Talking.

Human Beings Are The Only Creatures On Earth That Allow Their Children To Come Back Home.

You Can Turn Painful Situations Around Through Laughter. If You Can Find Humor In Anything, Even Poverty, You Can Survive It.

The Truth Is That Parents Are Not Really Interested In Justice. They Just Want Quiet.

No Matter How Calmly You Try To Referee, Parenting Will Eventually Produce Bizarre Behavior, And I'm Not Talking About The Kids. Their Behavior Is Always Normal.

Always End The Name Of Your Child With A Vowel, So That When You Yell The Name Will Carry.

Poets Have Said That The Reason To Have Children Is To Give Yourself Immortality. Immortality? Now That I Have Five Children, My Only Hope Is That They Are All Out Of The House Before I Die.

Like Everyone Else Who Makes The Mistake Of Getting Older, I Begin Each Day With Coffee And Obituaries.

Men And Women Belong To Different Species And Communications Between Them Is Still In Its Infancy.

Let Us Now Set Forth One Of The Fundamental Truths About Marriage: The Wife Is In Charge.

The Heart Of Marriage Is Memories; And If The Two Of You Happen To Have The Same Ones And Can Savor Your Reruns, Then Your Marriage Is A Gift From The Gods.

Civilization Had Too Many Rules For Me, So I Did My Best To Rewrite Them.

I Am Certainly Not An Authority On Love Because There Are No Authorities On Love, Just Those Who've Had Luck With It And Those Who Haven't.

The Main Goal Of The Future Is To Stop Violence. The World Is Addicted To It.

As I Have Discovered By Examining My Past, I Started Out As A Child. Coincidentally, So Did My Brother. My Mother Did Not Put All Her Eggs In One Basket, So To Speak: She Gave Me A Younger Brother Named Russell, Who Taught Me What Was Meant By 'Survival Of The Fittest.'

In Order To Succeed, Your Desire For Success Should Be Greater Than Your Fear Of Failure.

If The New American Father Feels Bewildered And Even Defeated, Let Him Take Comfort From The Fact That Whatever He Does In Any Fathering Situation Has A Fifty Percent Chance Of Being Right.

There Is No Labor A Person Does That Is Undignified; If They Do It Right.

Gray Hair Is God's Graffiti.

There Is Hope For The Future Because God Has A Sense Of Humor And We Are Funny To God.

My Childhood Should Have Taught Me Lessons For My Own Fatherhood, But It Didn't Because Parenting Can Only Be Learned By People Who Have No Children.

Even Though Your Kids Will Consistently Do The Exact Opposite Of What You're Telling Them To Do, You Have To Keep Loving Them Just As Much.

Old Is Always Fifteen Years From Now.