P. J. O'Rourke Quotes And Sayings

The World Is Being Run By Irresponsible Spoiled Brats.

Any Terrorism Is An Attack On Libertarian Values.

There's One More Terrifying Fact About Old People: I'm Going To Be One Soon.

Of Course, No One Wants To Ban The Vote. Voting Should Remain Available For Sporting And Recreational Purposes. But Certain Types Of Votes Clearly Should Be Curtailed - 'Assault Votes,' For Example, In Which The Only Purpose Of The Vote Is To Harm Others.

Tv Ushered In The Age Of Postliteracy. And We Have Gone So Far Beyond That. I Mean, What With The Internet And Google And Wikipedia. We Have Entered The Age Of Post-intelligence.

I Like Making Things. I Have A Wood Shop At Home. I Am A Terrible Carpenter But I Love Doing It.

America Gives Every Appearance Of Being A Nation Besotted With Trashiness - Divorce, Illegitimacy, Casual Fridays.

Because Of Their Size, Parents May Be Difficult To Discipline Properly.

Russians Not Only Vehemently Despise Blacks, They Believe Africa Begins At The Ukraine Border.

Fiscal Conservatism Is Just An Easy Way To Express Something That Is A Bit More Difficult, Which Is That The Size And Scope Of Government, And Really The Size And Scope Of Politics In Our Lives, Has Grown Uncomfortable, Unwieldy, Intrusive And Inefficient.

Most People Sort Of Enjoy Going To Work Because Of The Socialisation, A Chance To Flirt With Co-workers And So On, But Actually Hate The Job They Do.

If You Talk To Most Businessmen, They'll Say That What They Do Is For The Public Good, But You Know They're Just Greedy, And Consumers Are Just Consuming For The Sake Of Their Own Greed.

I Think The Baby Boom Does Have A Tendency To Get Its Nose In Everything. The Greatest Generation Had A Better Tendency To Leave People Alone. Of Course, They Also Had A Better Tendency To Hate Everybody's Guts.

Even The Most Left-wing Politicians Worship Wealth Creation - As The Political-action-committee Collection Plate Is Passed.

I Had A Confused Early Hippie Phase, Which Was Like A Cafeteria Tray Of Sloppy, Semi-marxist Thoughts, Absorbed Second-hand.

On Inspection, Gaudi's Architecture Isn't Whimsical At All.

They Are Just Really Stupid People In Hollywood. You Write Them A Script, And They Say They Love It, They Absolutely Love It. Then They Say, 'But Doesn't It Need A Small Dog, And An Eskimo, And Shouldn't It Be Set In New Guinea?' And You Say, 'But It Is A Sophisticated Romantic Comedy Set In Paris.'

A 'Farm' Today Means 100,000 Chickens In A Space The Size Of A Motel 6 Shower Stall.

As A Longtime Former Resident Of 15 Years In Washington, I Wish That Everybody Would Stay Off The Mall With Their Political Cause So That We Can Get Out There, You Know, And Play Flag Football Or Frisbee, Or Walk The Dog Or Something - You Know, Which Is, You Know, What The National Mall Should Be For, In My Personal Opinion.

Government Is A Health Hazard. Governments Have Killed Many More People Than Cigarettes Or Unbuckled Seat Belts Ever Have.

Cleanliness Becomes More Important When Godliness Is Unlikely.

The District Of Columbia Is An Extreme Example Of Disconnect Between Financial Input And Educational Outcome. Unfortunately, Extreme Is Not The Same As Abnormal.

Popular Culture Has Become Engorged, Broadening And Thickening Until It's The Only Culture Anyone Notices.

Like Most Sensible People, You Probably Lost Interest In Modern Art About The Time That Julian Schnabel Was Painting Broken Pieces Of The Crockery That His Wife Had Thrown At Him For Painting Broken Pieces Of Crockery Instead Of Painting The Bathroom And Hall.

Kabul Is A Walled City, Which Sounds Romantic Except The Walls Are Pre-cast Reinforced Concrete Blast Barriers, 10 Feet Tall And 15 Feet Long And Moved Into Place With Cranes. The Walls Are Topped With Sandbags, And The Sandbags Are Topped With Guard Posts From Which Gun Barrels Protrude.

Staying Married May Have Long-term Benefits. You Can Elicit Much More Sympathy From Friends Over A Bad Marriage Than You Ever Can From A Good Divorce.

Supposedly, Summer Vacation Happens Because That's When The Kids Are Home From School, Although Having The Kids Home From School Is No Vacation. And Supposedly The Kids Are Home From School Because Of Some Vestigial Throwback To Our Agricultural Past.

There Are A Number Of Mechanical Devices Which Increase Sexual Arousal, Particularly In Women. Chief Among These Is The Mercedes-benz 380sl Convertible.

Government Proposes, Bureaucracy Disposes. And The Bureaucracy Must Dispose Of Government Proposals By Dumping Them On Us.

In Our Brief National History We Have Shot Four Of Our Presidents, Worried Five Of Them To Death, Impeached One And Hounded Another Out Of Office. And When All Else Fails, We Hold An Election And Assassinate Their Character.

I Like To Think Of My Behavior In The Sixties As A 'Learning Experience.' Then Again, I Like To Think Of Anything Stupid I've Done As A 'Learning Experience.' It Makes Me Feel Less Stupid.